Well Ladies and Gents, it was a total bust. A fun bust, but a bust none the less. I am out of the monetary affects required to stay afloat in this great city.
As many of you know, I moved to Tampa in June with the intentions of becoming the best educator folks this side of the Ohio River have ever seen. It didn't work out quite as planned. I had 12 interviews and sent out over 70 resumes to area schools without being presented with a single opportunity of employment. The nerve. I was unable to obtain part-time jobs for which I was clearly over qualified for but willing to do. I don't know what the Hoosier State ever did to The Sunshine State, but they clearly took major offense. After my 12th interview, I had sent the principal I interviewed with an eloquently written e-mail thanking him for the opportunity to apply and to hopefully consider me for future employment. It is my belief he took pity on me when he divulged what I'm about to tell you because the conversation began with, "We don't normally call people we haven't selected for a position after an interview, but..." My immediate thoughts were "Okay, well this slashes that last glimmer of hope circling around the notion that I may have gotten the position, but go on" and what he told me next was potentially crushing news but I was too caught up in accepting anything he told me as positive to notice it was in fact not positive news at all. In a carefully worded summary, I was basically told that due to my lack of experience with the Florida school systems it was unlikely I would be hired over a candidate that has interred in their schools but to "research their models because they are quite different". Generally speaking, I did not attend a Florida college therefore I wasn't going to be hired. Ever. I researched the models...pretty standard stuff my good sir. While I appreciate him calling me because he certainly didn't have to and also for being so nice about my perpetual rejections, my tower of optimism began to crumble. I've spent the last two solid weeks searching for jobs and sending resumes once more in hopes to keep hanging on but my efforts were fruitless.
It's been a great summer-- I have had the privilege of spending it in Florida. How would it not be great? In case you are all dying to know exactly what it is that I did day in and day out, you are about to be amazed because I shall fill you in.
1) Woke up generally around 11 am everyday.
2) Ate breakfast in bed-- don't worry, it was an air mattress. One may say it is the equivalent to having plastic sheets on your mattress.
3) Became an avid viewer of the following television shows that came in through my trusty antenna because I'm too poor to contribute to cable and Internet:
a) E! True Hollywood Story. Robert Downey Jr. sure had a rough time of it.
b) Cold Case Files. Case closed...see what I did there?
c) Eye for an Eye with Judge Extreme Akim or the Steve Wilko show. It was when these programs came on that I suddenly had the motivation to get up, put on my classy pants and be semi-productive i.e. Go steal free Internet somewhere in order to spend the next 5+ hours job hunting. I'm pretty sure the library employees contemplated whether or not I was a homeless person with a laptop seeking relief from the sweltering humidity.
4) Put away my bed. Due to laziness, I just picked up my mattress (that makes me sound awesome) and leaned it up against the wall in the hallway, which created a decorative padded wall piece. It really just tied the room together. Next, I would shower as I felt it was the one thing I could contribute to society at that point. **Update** My $109.98 air mattress now has an invisible, giant leak somewhere. Every few hours I wake up in a cocoon of thick plastic and have to reinflate. I can't wait for a real bed.
5) Ate my weight in seafood on a regular basis for dinner. Sometimes on the beach.
a) I enjoyed it. Immensely. My pants beg to differ.
b) Sometimes I cooked my own dinner-- which led to the, hold on let me count, 11 hot oil burns the left side of my body is wearing with pride. I knew that was too much olive oil.
6) Took in everything Florida had to offer to me that day. Rented at least two Redbox movies. I've watched some spectacularly poorly written/directed movies these last few weeks.
7) Came home. Removed padded wall that doubled as my bed and felt lucky when I would catch and episode of Friends, Seinfeld, or It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.
8) Slept.
And that sums up my daily life here. It was a good ride Tampa. A big thanks go out to my dear friend Amanda for letting me bunk up and try to start a new life in Florida. Even though it didn't work out, it was well worth effort. I met some cool people and witnessed some amazing things.
In conclusion, I shall be retreating home this weekend. I'm really disappointed that I couldn't make it work. But nevertheless, back to the Fort I go. I now have my sights set on Indianapolis and have become proficient in the area of moving cities. Perhaps a bit wiser as well. I will do whatever it takes to start my life anew once more. Have already submitted resumes like crazy. Ideally teaching or find someone willing to hire me as a writer and pay me accordingly--which would be extraordinarily amazing. See some of you soon!
P.S. Florida, I will miss you. Thanks for the affair.
Kind Regards,
Heather
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