Life Doesn't Wait

I imagine the small amount of readers I have figured I held true to my past habits and earlier guarantee of sorts that this blog might not last and would in fact die in a brief amount of time.  It almost did.  But have no fear, my recent boredom has forced me back into writing and I'm sure you all have been dying to find out what has been going on in my life these last two weeks. 

It's the first day of Spring!  My favorite season has finally arrived and I am more than thrilled to be welcoming it again with open, pasty white- out of shape- Bingo arms.  I heard that oh so familiar and loved sound of thunder earlier today and my excitement immediately increased only to be given the hammer as I never heard it again.  Oh well, in due time I shall get my spring storm.  Anyway, my lack of writing has been attributed to the fact that those little germ incubators at work transferred strep throat into my blood stream-- no, we don't condone the sharing of needles at the daycare-- and I was hugely down and out for the count and in complete misery.  I don't know if any of you have ever had it, but it was my first time and let me just say that I've never wished I could bargain to trade for the flu or lead poisoning instead of that infectious nightmare in my entire life.  I woke up one morning feeling like someone thought it would be funny to blowtorch my throat whilst I slept and placed bets on how far they could jam an ice pick into my ears.  I can't imagine why people would ever want to make a career out of swallowing knives and swords?  I don't know about you but feeling like a steak knife is lodged into my throat every time I attempt to swallow saliva isn't my idea of thrilling.  So it of course derailed my...poor attempt at dieting as I was only able to consume bread and ice, which brings me to my next point.

I am completely and utterly a creature of habit whether or not I want to admit it-- well I suppose I try to be a creature of habit but the repetition drives me insane and those wretched excuses made their way into my brain and now it's two weeks later and my wagon was unable to forge across the river, broke a wheel and the axle snapped in half with no general store or Native Americans in sight to trade with. So, really, I guess I secretly long to be a creature of habit when it comes to certain things...which makes my previous statement null and void. I honestly think there has to be a recessive obesity gene floating around somewhere in my body whispering carbohydrate filled nothings into my ears because I find any reason to consume my favorite foods and convince myself I'll make up for it later.  I need to rid myself of this nasty gene soon.  Thank the good Lord above that the weather is getting nicer because I'll at least get outside more and probably won't end up on a Hov-a-Round to grocery shop while my butt-crack hangs out of my Fruit of the Loom maternity pants just yet.  I also don't want to disappoint you readers in thinking that I am unable to make good on a promise I made to myself-- so thanks for indirectly, unintentionally and probably unwillingly contributing to my drive to get healthy.  I've yet to go back and see what damage has been done, so unfortunately (please contain your emotions) I have no news to report with that.

Speaking of nice weather and being active, someone PLEASE help me out.  I need an adventure.  I need to go out hiking and exploring in some awesome places that I don't have to pay $300, which does not include a complimentary snack or drink anymore--cheap bastards, to get to.  Or at least give me some suggestions-- I want to visit somewhere that wouldn't be more than a weekend thing that could bring me rejuvenation and disprove the idea engrained into my soul that there aren't very many invigorating places in the Midwest.  It'd be nice if I could get people to go with me, so if you are also in dire need of an adventure and your muscles are screaming at you to get off your lazy gluteus maximus and explore the great outdoors...we need to talk.  My need for constant adventure is shouting louder than my inner fat girl does when walking by a soft pretzel vendor, so that is saying a whole heap.  Any feedback on this matter is appreciated.

Well that's all for now you crazy kids.  Enjoy the day and the new season!!!!!